Last night was like lifting the weight off my chest. I finally removed the item that my ex left at my house. I knew we were not getting back together, but for what ever reason I was holding onto some of his belongs. Over the past week I have been taken control back over my life and making myself happy. How long will it last? I don't know but right now i'm living in the moment. One of my brother friends told me last night that I need a No Contact Rule or NCR is what she call it. No calling, emailing, faxing, message in a bottle, texting, communication by osmosis, Morse code, or anything. No contact means no contact. It is that simple. I will sit on my hands, tape my dialing fingers together, and reward myself for getting to milestones but do not contact him. This morning I woke up and made a list of thing that I must control in order not to contact him:
When I'm hormonal, horny, drunk, lonely, nostalgic, weak or in case of an emergency. thats what close friends are for. If I react to any of these booby traps, I will not only end up regretting it, but I will have to start the whole process all over again, whilst he sits there thinking ‘ so she does still want me. Mmm, yeah I knew she would come around.’ I Instruct all that know both of us not to come to me with any information about him, unless he has ‘the clap’ or some other such STD that affects my health. I need to move on and forget about him, not be hearing out of context information where people make more out of something than actually exists. No sex with him. That is what my hitachi is for. No quick fumbles, slippery snogs, one last shag for old times sake, or any bodily contact. Ever and I mean Ever. This is my first step of turning my life around. Thank you to all the good friends that have been right there to support me when I was down in the dumps.
Tiamia "Rookielove" Owens
Be encouraged - tough choices are never easy ...
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